'Guard dog expenses for... a chihuahua named Princess': 40 Hilarious items business owners tried to write off as a work expense

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Sep 6, 2023 5:00 PM EDT

Business expenses, what are they and how do they work? The people in this thread clearly need a 101 class on the topic. 

U/CheesecakeOdd2087 asked the r/Accounting community to share the "most ridiculous thing you've ever seen a client try to expense." They had some amazing answers! It seems that for starters, most people just don't understand accounting or taxes or expenses very well in the first place. Secondly, it appears that lots of people think of business expenses as a catchall basket for any random purchase, even if it's only marginally related to the task at hand. 

Check out these hilarious responses below, like the woman who wanted to expense her weekly trips to the nail salon because she need to look professional. That may not be advisable, but I love her moxie, and on a personal and spiritual level I agree with her thought process. Meanwhile, other people shared stories of people who wanted to expense vacation costs, cat food, a fortune teller, and more. It's quite an eclectic bunch of items. 

Next up, this bride had a fit over her SIL's choice of dress… for a dress the SIL wore to her own party, two weeks before the bride's wedding. 

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  • 01
    Boat - Most ridiculous thing you've ever seen a client try to expense? LeMansDynasty. Tax (US) EA not CPA A boat. They owned a flooring company.
    via Roberto H on Unsplash
  • 02
    Font - Most ridiculous thing you've ever seen a client try to expense? What's the most ridiculous thing you've ever seen a client try to expense?
    via u/CheesecakeOdd2087
  • 03
    Font - DuchessSandwich. Their entire apartment as a home office since "they have to be able to sleep in order to work and earn money".
    via u/DuchessSandwich
  • 04
    Happy - PacoMahogany Trips to Costa Rico for "researching" bamboo to use as a construction material
    via u/PacoMahogany
  • 05
    Font - jswizle52 Bruno mars concert for "advertising ", client taking a "note payable" form a business to use and then write off as bad debt
    via u/jswizle52
  • 06
    Font - skuzuer28 A roughly $50k all- inclusive resort vacation. on top Client was a b of it being totally unreasonable expense. Didn't reclassify it to distributions, left it on as non-deductible entertainment.
    via u/skuzuer28
  • 07
    Font - umounjo03 I'm in industry but I handle the T&E reporting... we just fired an employee who's been at the company for 4 months for charging $65k worth of personal to the company S card. Wedding caterer, flowers, Jimmy Choo, furniture, you name it she bought it.
    via u/umounjo03
  • 08
    Product - accrual_to_cash_papi. Child support payments buried in office supplies.
    via u/accrual_to_cash_papi
  • 09
    Font - ModBell CPA, CA (Can) I had a client who owned an IT related company, mid sized at about 100 employees. Year end rolls around and he informs me he got some travel agent license and here are all the receipts for his personal travel to book in the company accounts. I was like w are you talking about. "Well, if I'm a travel agent now we're an IT and travel agency and I can expense all my personal travel as research."
    via u/ModBell
  • 10
    Font - "Are you actually doing any travel agent work?" "Are you joking why would I waste my time doing that" "Yeah thats definitely not allowed" "What do you mean I'm a travel agent now these are valid expenses" Took multiple phone calls and explanations that this wouldnt fly before he finally signed off on that year end and tax return. Fired our firm after for 'not providing the services he expected'
    via u/ModBell
  • 11
    Font - LeMansDynasty. Tax (US) EA not CPA A boat. They owned a flooring company. Recing their tax to book now.They always wonder why the bookkeeping bill keeps going up. I've never told them on a quarterly basis to stop commingling personal and business expenses, for 3 years like every quarter, NEVER!
    via u/LeMansDynasty.
  • 12
    Font - Versace shades, designer clothing, their home mortgage, their Bentley, their ex-wife's alimony, their kids education, their face lifts, their teeth whitening, pedicures, girls trip jet ski rentals (all for marketing to look attractive for more sales). Basically working at SMALL firms, you see it all. I loved it but f the hours and pay.
    via r/Accounting
  • 13
    Font - NissanSkyline GT-R. CPA, CA (Can) A landlocked real estate company trying to write off the founder's new $750k yacht. Smh don't they know it's supposed to be capitalized?
    via u/NissanSkylineGT-R
  • 14
    Font - CoatAlternative1771. I've never seen anything too rediculous. I did have a client (woman) who would, and for the life of me I don't know how, max out credit cards with expenses towards nails, hair, massage, food, etc every few months, get a new credit card with a larger credit limit due to the success of her business, and then carry over than balance on the new card and rinse/repeat.
    via u/CoatAlternative1771
  • 15
    Font - I explained that eventually she will have to pay this off. She was just like, meh. Who cares. I'll just file for bankruptcy. She was basically a stay at home mom who had a child with disabilities, realized there was no business to help her with her kid, made one, and just made money like a money printer. It was insane.
    via u/CoatAlternative1771
  • 16
    Font - penguin808080 Cat food. Dude owned like 10 cats and turned in every petco receipt for years 35 Reply Share ImYourPapa My clients actually have an office cat to take care of mice so we always book food to supplies
    via u/penguin808080
  • 17
    Font - AtoSy88 0800 fortune telling
    via u/AtoSy88
  • 18
    Font - Pointy_Stix. CPA (US) One client tried to write off an expensive watch as an employee recognition award. Client has no employees. Another client tried to write off his wedding expenses: Engagement ring for then fiance (buried in marketing expense) • Rehearsal dinner in meals & entertainment (pre-TCJA)
    via u/Pointy_Stix
  • 19
    Font - One of our travel agent clients thinks they can cruise the entire world & write off the cruises as "research" expenses. I see another comment below with a travel agent with a similar mindset.
    via u/Pointy_Stix
  • 20
    Font - ThatUglyGuy12 A client tried to expense his two children's college tuition, bi weekly flights to his 2nd home, a 5th car purchase that he wasn't using for the business, accessories to his new car, among many more smaller expenses.. He also couldn't understand why we had to back out of 30K IRS fines and penalties (he wouldn't tell us the reason so we were left baffled how an S-Corp could owe that much in penalties). This is not a joke, but we had to back out 200k of expenses from his P&L.
    via u/ThatUglyGuy12
  • 21
    Font - COR Efficient-Ad-4439. His timeshare in Cancun. It was a construction company.
    via u/Efficient-Ad-4439
  • 22
    Font - cherrybounce Well it's not "ridiculous" per se because it's common but it's the logic that's ridiculous. My sister-in-law pays absolutely every personal bill she and my BIL have through his company. I don't know what they're coding them to but they record them as business expenses. Finally another CPA also told her she can't do that but her "logic" is if the company pays her husband he's just going to use the money to pay the personal bills anyway.
    via u/cherrybounce
  • 23
    Font - owenmills04 His grandson's daycare Plot twist: it wasn't a client. It was the CEO/owner and I was the Director of Finance(essentially CFO)
    via u/owenmills04
  • 24
    Font - Lump-of-baryons. Their entire house, insisted it was 100% business use and wouldn't budge on that. Oh and the 100% business use Bentley. Client ended up firing us without completing their tax returns, which we were fine with lol
    via u/Lump-of-baryons
  • 25
    Font - Not Dead Yet57 Season tickets to basketball games, with access to the fancy lounge. He said it was advertising because he hands out business cards.
    via u/NotDeadYet57
  • 26
    Human body - FiendishGarbler · The front door of their house.
    via u/FiendishGarbler
  • 27
    Font - youdubdub Not a client, but a lady I worked for once. We performed consulting services on nearly solely federally funded projects for a state DOT. She really and truly was the worst accountant I've ever had the displeasure to work for or with. She would force me to go to fundraisers for political campaigns and donate money. One particular such guy was Scott Walker, who ended up winning the governorship, and nearly immediately eliminating many state employees' unions and benefits.
    via u/youdubdub
  • 28
    Font - When the state auditors came to audit her indirect cost rate, it was truly remarkable. She was ultimately disbarred for an undetermined amount of time as a result of the audit. What for? 1. Expensing a car battery purchase by her related entity, a water bottling plant for $150, but booking it in the entity under audit as a "printer" in quickbooks. The auditor happened to select that item.
    via u/youdubdub
  • 29
    Font - She promptly provided a copy of the invoice for the printer and referred to it as a "mistake." 2. Pretending to pay her mechanical (not civil) engineer son and marketing degree-holding daughter in order to inflate admin expenses by ~$75k. They both lived out of state and had no idea what our company did, and she forced them to pay all of the wages back to ber. Notably she owed me several thousands of dollars of back back pay at that
    via u/youdubdub
  • 30
    Font - time. Yes, I was already on a search at the time. 3. Blatantly booking her trip to the Rose Bowl to attend "scott Walker rose bowl party" as travel expense. Again, the auditors had just lost many of their state employee benefits resultant from his recent victory. I have four kids, and she didn't tell me about any of the findings until I opened the disbarment letter in the mail. I left that day.
    via u/youdubdub
  • 31
    Font - Moral of the story: don't grow out of your indirect cost rate, and if you do, bill less, don't defraud the people and fu with the peoples' money... sometimes they f back.
    via u/youdubdub
  • 32
    Font - HappyKnitter34 Staff Accountant Not me. But a coworker just had a client who tried to expense his family trip to Disney by saying "I paid for two people from the business to go so it's a business expense."
    via u/HappyKnitter34
  • 33
    Font - Not Dead Yet57 Weekly $100 nail salon visits for a realtor because she said it was part of her "professional image".
    via u/NotDeadYet57
  • 34
    Font - Ona cdnmi A very high end bag (purse) receipt, bought in Vegas, for his wife or girlfriend. Dude was a self employed construction guy. I told him I wasn't using it and he's all "But I just it to tote my documents"!" Bahaha. Nope.
    via u/cdnmi
  • 35
    Font - New_Pop6512 Lol. A client we had did not pay his taxes for a while, then proceeded to have his Maserati written off as a business expense. Little did we know, his business was on the first floor of the local IRS building. See
    via u/New_Pop6512
  • 36
    Font - robsteoperosis Two new C8 Corvettes for a construction company. They put a magnet on the side for "advertising"
    via u/robsteoperosis
  • 37
    Font - PhgAH Backstory, I did audit for a Japan's FDI firm in South East Asia, the managers of these firms are always Japanese sent by parents company and the norm is that the FDI would pay salary, tax, rent and every other expense for these expat. One of the dude tried to expense his vacation trip with his sugar baby as "potential customer meeting". We caught it cuz the hotel bill also included a $1000 wine bottle and a request for "heart shape rose petal package".
    via u/PhgAH
  • 38
    Font - Anacondoleezza CPA (US) Jet boat. They called it a mobile office. Partner signed off on it.
    via u/Anacondoleezza
  • 39
    Smile - boitrubl A boat because he "might" charter it
    via u/boitrubl
  • 40
    Font - jb40k Guard dog expenses for a junk yard. It was for a chihuahua named princess. Six pounds of bl dy murder I'm sure.
    via u/jb40k
  • 41
    Font - vinogirl509 Laundry detergent and soap; because he had to be clean and have clean clothes to go to work. He said this as there were 3 flies hovering around him, clearly not having bathed in the last couple of days. He was a mail carrier in a rural area. It was my first year in tax prep, 25 years ago, I learned a lot that year, how to say no tactfully.
    via u/vinogirl509
  • 42
    Font - HNK-von-herringen. Golf membership fees for networking and getting new clients. Not the worst, nor necessarily illegal as in my country you could (for as far as I know) technically defend this in front of a judge if you can prove you really don't use it for personal use and actually get new clients out of it, but obviously no one who tries to expense golf membership for networking actually uses it solely for networking lol.
    via u/HNK-von-herringen

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